There is power in words! There are love letters which touch the heart,
“Dear John” letters that break the heart, contracts that are legal and
binding, marriage licenses which create a lifetime of togetherness, and
there is the Word of God that gives us daily counsel to live by.
We have been studying the book of Ephesians. In it Paul describes Christians
as being “blessed with every spiritual blessing!” In response to those
blessings we are called upon Walk in Love, Walk in the Light, and Walk
with Wisdom. We ended our study last week with these words …
Eph 5
17 Therefore do not be unwise, but understand what the will of the Lord
is.
18 And do not be drunk with wine, in which is dissipation; but be filled
with the Spirit,
19 speaking to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing
and making melody in your heart to the Lord,
20 giving thanks always for all things to God the Father in the name
of our Lord Jesus Christ,
21 submitting to one another in the fear of God.
Paul exhorts us to be filled with the Spirit, making melody in our
hearts to the Lord, giving thanks for all things … and submitting to
one another in the fear of the Lord.
We enjoy being blessed with every spiritual blessing! What joy! We
love being filled with the Spirit and having a new song in our hearts!
What joy! When we are singing those songs we can give thanks for everything!
What joy! But then we are to submit to one another!
With each the proceeding blessings creating such joy within us … is
it possible that submitting to one another is also something that creates
joy?
To the modern American submission sounds like a harsh, archaic word.
No one wants to submit to anyone … other than themselves.
The Dictionary describes submission as … to yield oneself to the authority
or will of another: to Surrender …or to defer to or consent to the opinion
or authority of another. But there is nothing in the dictionary about
the joy of yielding, the joy of surrendering, or the joy of deferring
to another. For the JOY of it!
To find the joy of submission we must first find the joy of servanthood.
When you make a special meal for someone you love; when you purchase
a gift to surprise a close friend; when you enable someone to accomplish
their goal; there is a warmth of joy and satisfaction that accompanies
our serving. That is the joy of submission! You submitted your will,
your time, your energy, your funds, and someone was blessed because of
it!
Jesus
Acts 3:26 God, having raised up His Servant Jesus, sent Him to bless
you.
Paul
1 Cor 9:19 though I am free from all men, I have made myself a servant
to all, that I might win the more;
Phoebe
Rom 16:1-2 I commend to you Phoebe our sister, who is a servant of the
church in Cenchrea, 2 that you may receive her in the Lord in a manner
worthy of the saints,
Tychicus
Col 4:7 Tychicus, a beloved brother, faithful minister, and fellow servant
in the Lord,
An angel in heaven
Rev 19:10 (the words of an angel, to John) I am your fellow servant.
These men and women became servants of God and in a real sense they
became servants of one another. They submitted themselves to the needs
of others in order to meet that need and to become a blessing! Biblical
submission is being a blessing to others! That is where the joy comes
from!
Then we find those dreaded words …
Eph 5:22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.
But we can’t stop there! Read on!
Eph 5:25 Husbands, love your wives.
These words didn’t just pop out of the pages. They are in the context
of being filled with the Spirit, singing Spiritual songs, giving thanks,
and submitting to one another joyfully as servants! The joy of submitting
to one another in the Body of Christ works in the Church, in society,
and in the home. This isn’t a program of one person having dominion over
the other … This is two people submitting to one another for the joy
of blessing the other person!
There is never a greater joy in a family than when everyone within
the family is willing to serve the other members of the family in a gracious,
loving manner. And the opposite is true! There is never a more miserable
place than a home where the husband and wife are always competing with
each other and continually attempting to dominate the other. There is
no room in a happy marriage for the game of “who’s in charge now?”
Someone asked the question of why the wives get the first command:
“Wives, submit to your husbands …” I can’t say that I really know but
in every list in the Bible where proper authority is explained it always
begins with the wives, then the husbands, then the children, then employees
to their boss. Is it my imagination or does Paul and Peter begin with
“the greater” and work towards “the lesser?” And wives are first!
Eph 5
24 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.
23 For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the
church; and He is the Savior of the body.
24 Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives
be to their own husbands in everything.
If you understand being blessed with all the spiritual blessing in
heaven through Christ our Lord; if you understand being “in Christ” and
having authority over spiritual powers of wickedness; if you understand
that Jesus broke down the wall of separation which kept us from loving
relationships; if you understand that He has made us the Habitation of
God the Father because He loved us so much; then you can understand being
submitted to Him!
Then you begin understanding the relationship that a wife has with
her husband, because the husband completes the picture by loving his
wife!
Eph 5
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and
gave Himself for her,
28 So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he
who loves his wife loves himself.
29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it,
just as the Lord does the church.
Remember … Paul began this with the words, 21 submitting to one another
in the fear of God. The husband’s responsibility to his wife in the act
of submission is to love her like Christ loved the Church. And how did
Christ love the Church? He gave Himself for her. He left His place as
God in heaven, was born into the earth, lived with the difficulties and
insults of life, and died on the cross taking the punishment for our
sins upon Himself. He gave himself for her. He kept nothing for himself.
If you understand how Jesus Christ has nourished and cherished the
Church, then you can understand how husbands are to love their wives.
All the blessing of Ephesians chapters one, two, and three came upon
the Church because of Christ’s great love! He fought the battles and
he won the war … all for the joy of giving life, health, freedom, and
eternity in heaven to His bride, the Church!
This is not a one way street for either husbands or wives! This is
two people who are willing to enter the adventure of serving one another
for the joy of it!
Paul then ends this phase of his teaching by adding these words:
Eph 5
32 This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church.
33 Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife
as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.
Servanthood through love and respect works for joy in our relationship
with Jesus, in our relationship with each other, and in our relationships
at home. The greatest need a woman has is to be loved and cherished.
The greatest need a man has is to be respected.
We have the key to joy in our home in this one simple verse. To love,
to respect, submit and serve; and you will find joy in your home and
in your living.
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